Do Your New Year’s Resolutions Seem Like Groundhog Day and What Can You Do to Change That?

If you’re like many of the population who find the beginning of the calendar year a good time to reflect on your goals and set ‘New Year’s Resolutions’ for yourself, do you also find that several of your goals feel like déjà vu as in the movie, ‘Groundhog Day’.

In that timeless film classic, Phil the weather man, played by actor Bill Murray awakens each day to find that every day is the same as the previous one and that no matter how he tries to change it with his actions, he is trapped in some kind of time loop and he experiences the same things with the same people, over and over again.

So, why is it that many of us seem destined to realise that the goals we want to achieve may be the same unfulfilled goals that we set at the same time last year?

There can be many reasons for this tendency to appear stuck in the same kind of weird, but annual, time loop that Phil was subjected to on a daily basis. Let’s explore why this happens and how you can break free from this apparent curse.

Lack of Clarity

People often set a resolution such as for example, ‘This year, I’m going to get myself fit!’

What does that even mean? How fit? What does ‘fit’ look like? Do you measure it by your ability to walk up the stairs without getting breathless? Does it involve fitting into an old pair of trousers that you wore when you were ten years younger? Is there an arbitrary figure on the scales that would signal success?

The point is that vague = meaningless. You are setting yourself up to fail because you haven’t clearly defined how you will know when you’ve achieved it, or even if you are ‘on track’ to achieve it. In short, you need clarity and specifics. Most importantly, you need to be clear about why it matters to you, and you need a plan. I cover more on this topic in my book, ‘If Life’s Worth Doing, It’s Worth Doing Well’, especially in relation to ‘SMART’ goals.

Lack of Motivation

The first question that you should really ask yourself is ‘Why is this important to me?’ If you can’t answer that, you’re onto a non-starter. If you’re reliant on willpower to get you through the testing times but you don’t have a big enough ‘Why’ then you’ll probably cave. That’s why most New Year’s Resolutions fall by the wayside before the end of January. You simply weren’t serious or sure enough about why it mattered. If you want advice on this, I’d highly recommend Simon Sinek’s inspirational book, ‘Start with Why’.

Lack of Action Plan

Another big reason why many New Year’s Resolutions are abandoned is simply that you don’t have a clearly defined, written plan of how you will achieve it. Chunking down the big goals into smaller steps will massively increase your chances of sticking at it. If you want some excellent help on this, I’d recommend reading James Clear’s excellent book, entitled ‘Atomic Habits’. James points out that when you fail, it’s usually because you didn’t have a good enough system to succeed. He offers invaluable tips on how to stack the odds in your favour by creating new habits. For example, if you want to go running, change your identity to think of yourself as a ‘runner’ and leave your running shoes by the bed, so that you see them first thing. If you can do the new habit for even two minutes a day, and you build on that, you’ll soon become the new you that you aspire to be. Having a clear, structured plan will also help you overcome procrastination. Tony Robbins, the ‘Mindset Guru’ always says that you should never set a goal without immediately starting with some kind of action step towards its accomplishment.

Lack of Skills or Knowledge

We often fail to achieve our goals because we lack either the required skills or specific knowledge to achieve the desired result. Both can be overcome if you are willing to put in the effort. The amount of information available either via YouTube, Google or AI is simply mind-blowing. If you study enough on your chosen topic, you will find an abundance of ‘how to’ material.

Lack of Resources

As with skills and knowledge, resources can usually be tracked down easily via the internet, AI or through personal contacts. As they say, it may be a case of ‘who you know’, not just ‘what you know’. The more you can surround yourself with friends and associates, the more people you can reach out to on any given topic, and people are usually more than happy to help with information or connections when you ask. If you want people to help you, be a person who helps others.

Wrong Mindset – Fear of Failure (or Success)

This one is a big determinant of success – how we think of ourselves, bearing in mind that we are often our own worst critics. An excellent book on this subject is “The Imposter Cure’ by Dr Jessamy Hibberd. We can also really learn to acknowledge but still repel those negative thoughts as are brilliantly explained in Eckhart Tolle’s book, ‘The Power of Now’.

Lack of Confidence

You build belief through action. You will almost always have some setbacks, but as you overcome those challenges, you realise that you are in fact capable. You become competent by doing, failing and going again until you master something. Think about how you as a baby first learned to crawl, then walk. You probably won’t remember that far back but think about other things you have achieved in your life – perhaps learning to ride a bike or drive a car. You could probably drive down a street so effortlessly that you’re on autopilot, planning what you’ll have for dinner that day, yet when you first sat in the driver’s chair, you had to concentrate intensely to put the car in the right gear and interpret all the road signals. In other words, you CAN develop confidence if you’re brave enough to get started. A brilliant book on this is ‘The Obstacle Is the Way’ by Ryan Holiday.

Lack of Discipline

One of the biggest reasons for abandoning those resolutions or goals is our inability to stick at the new habits and actions that are required to implement the changes needed. Most of the books I’ve already cited will touch on this aspect, but you can also find a comprehensive list of self-help books on my website. Discipline can be better achieved by ticking off all of the above issues: gaining clarity; understanding how you and/or others will benefit; creating and immediately beginning to implement the first steps of an action plan, acquiring the skills and knowledge required; sourcing the necessary resources; overcoming any limiting beliefs or fears; building confidence as you go; and generating the discipline to see it through.

Finding a Mentor or Coach

One of the best things you can do in life is to ask for help and guidance. Seek people who can mentor or coach you to achieve your goals. Model the actions of those who have already done, or are still successfully doing, what you aspire to do. As a Business Coach and Life Coach I have helped many people to work through the issues mentioned above. I too have sought advice on my own journey. In fact, if you really want to learn something and master it, try teaching it to others. In helping them, you too will challenge yourself to grow further.

I hope this has helped you and I wish you the best of luck to escape the ‘Groundhog Day’ trap this year. If you need any help, feel free to get in touch through this site.